Good day to you! 

This time of year is often very difficult for many. The days are short and dark, often with bad weather making it even worse to get through. Many are alone and feeling depressed. Those who are busy just want this time of year to be over with. 

For myself I think they key is getting up in the morning and trying to find something to focus on that I am grateful for. Some mornings it is that there is not much pain, or the sun is shining, maybe I see a little bird outside the window looking in. I try and remember I have people around me who help support me emotionally and love me. What ever it is that you can find, find it. Hold on to it all day if necessary and try and smile. It does help!! May this holiday season be gentle on you and bring you happiness and peace.  

Joy... often illusive or we don't even notice it. What makes you happy? What brings you even a small amount of joy? Take time during this busy season to look at what brings you joy and do more of it. Let other things wait, they will still be there and when you start them, you will be happier!  ~P

Survival for each of us means something different. Some of us try to just get through the next hour or one day. Some are trying to just survive what life is handing them, illness, accidents, being homeless, earth quakes and the list goes on.  What ever you are trying to survive, remember, just keep the faith that things will get better and try and move forward just one little step at a time. Do not give up!! ~P

Today is the last day of October... which means there will be little people celebrating Halloween tonight. The pumpkin awaits being carved and candy brought out that was hidden away (so we would not eat it before!!). I unfortunately have still not found most of my Halloween decorations that were packed away thus making it simple to decorate this year. My wish for all is a very SAFE and happy Halloween!! 

Today I am in a process of flux. All is changing, moving, trying to finish things and start new. I apologize for not posting for such a long time. My life has totally changed and I am still trying to catch up to the changes. 

I see the last time I posted was back in June of 2013. I was in Paris France, life was moving along according to my schedule. July 2, 2013 my husband passed away and all changed. I am back in Michigan, mom and 2 friends live here with me and life is so different from what I had lived the past 15 years. Instead of seeing Paris all around me, I see nature. Instead of a small apartment I am back in the family home. Some of the changes are good for me, some I don't care for. But, life does not always give us the choices we want, it gives us what we are to live. 

I will try and get a computer equipped with the files I need to do what I want to get this up and running again. That room, which will be the new "office" is in the middle of a tear-apart, hence...no external to post with! I need to make parts of the house more...ME... not still those who used to live here and are now gone. I need to make this house my "HOME" and get it organized. It has been in either a holding pattern for the last year or a state of flux or both, but nothing has really happened to be truly organized or set up the way I want it. I have not been able to get to the life I packed up 16 years ago when I left for France. I suddenly realize this is not a quick process, but a long, extended one of sorting, moving, getting rid of and trying to 'fix' things that are just now how I want. I need to learn to go one room at a time and in the mean time be organized enough so things run smoothly for all. Soon we will be down to 3 of us here which will make it much easier as I will gain 1/2 my garage and 1 1/2 rooms which will also give the space to be able to sort and move boxes into. Then I can truly begin to get things set up. 

For me, the things around me need to be in order for my mind to calm. My goal is to have a garage I can park in, have things in order enough to find what I need when I need it, get rid of all that is not needed or wanted and to have some time for me to do some of the things I enjoy doing while trying to live life each day instead of wishing it was not how it is. Tall order!!  But, my goal is positive, I am trying to focus on the positive around me instead of the negative and move on. 

Grief is something that needs to be worked through while trying to stay positive. I grieve for my husband, my friends in Paris, my life that was there. I struggle with a lack of funds, a life that changed without it being in my plans and a mother living with me with dementia. Life will not necessarily be what I had planned, but it is still my life and I will learn to live it as it is now. I need to focus on positive things, live life daily and be happy.  Thank you for still being there through all of this and I hope this blog did and will continue to help you though what ever you may be going through as well. 

Peace be with you.